Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Let the Surgery Blog-Spree Begin!

Before anyone freaks out... Bridgette's fine.

Well, actually she was up until 4:16 a.m. today (yesterday?) screaming deliriously with pain we could not officially place (probably digestive pain from the corn chips we fed her at a family dinner Sunday night). But now she seems fine. We're hoping for a more restful night tonight, for all of us.

No THIS surgery (first typed sugary... which it is not) blog-spree is for my Mom, who will be having her own hospital experience this week. Since I'm no longer in my hometown where I can take care of her (read: 973 miles away), I told her I would attempt a-blog-a-day to keep her entertained. I hope it's beneficial like morphine, but more fun.

Beginning tomorrow (no wait! tonight! I'm 59 minutes early!) I will write a-blog-a-day for a week.

Tonight's theme (besides "a-blog-a-day" and (parenthetical inserts)) is ... GUESS WHAT!

First on the Guess What list --

GUESS WHAT happens when your not-quite-two-year-old plays beautiful piano music while you're cleaning the kitchen, only instead of playing with her fingers, punches each note lovingly with a green Sharpie!

ANSWER:

Second --

GUESS WHAT removes that Sharpie like no other!

ANSWER: Way to go Mr. Clean Magic Eraser. (Many thanks to the various friends who offered suggestions.)

Third --

GUESS WHAT word is the cutest when uttered from Bridgette's tiny face!

ANSWER: Misssss

TRANSLATION: Mess

Fourth --

GUESS WHAT Bridgette surprised me with last night while we snuggled together on the couch around 3 a.m.!

ANSWER: Four slobbery, smacking, totally unexpected kisses, right in a row. Darling.

Fifth --

GUESS WHAT I won!

ANSWER: The techie haiku contest for ThinkGeek.com and a $50 gift certificate to my favorite on-line shopping bazaar!

My haiku was published in their latest newsletter (at the very bottom where almost no one will be sure to see it) and will soon be displayed proudly on the techie haiku page of ThinkGeek's website (which I cannot currently find, but I know it exists because I went there once and read the haiku entry rules).

This totally counts as one of my proudest moments in life, like when I won the ugly-tie coloring-contest at the mall when I was 10 years old, or when I had a column published in the Salt Lake Tribune that I forgot I had submitted, or when I won the UVU website design competition because there were only two entries and everyone felt sorry for me since I was the only girl in the IT Club and had absolutely no experience in web design and did the whole site in Dreamweaver.

I had the same kind of happy rush when I found out I won the haiku contest, especially because they didn't tell me in advance. I just read the newsletter like usual and whammo! There it was, signed "Kelly - Dagobah, Outer Rim Territory." That's me.

Why the fake address? It wasn't that I worried people would track me down and pin a sign to my back saying something I couldn't quite see. It's more that I wasn't sure they'd take me seriously if I told them I live in suburban America, in a house.

HERE IT IS!

Submit Your Techie Haiku, Win $50!
The latest ThinkGeek Techie Haiku Winner is Kelly from Dagobah, Outer Rim Territory!
We lovingly title it, "By Your Command."

Soon We'll Have Toasters
Folding Our Towels Until
The Thousand Year War

TRANSLATION: Don't understand? You should be grateful. Want to understand? Why?

Ok. It's a reference to Battlestar Gallactica, where Cylons = Toasters and The Thousand Year War = The Thousand Year Beginning of the Annihilation of the Human Race by Highly-Evolved Cylons that Humans Built but Eventually, Demeaningly Call Toasters. Oh yes. And also this:



Cool, no?

My personal congratulations go to the team at U. of Cal., Berkeley, for their brilliant 2010 build. (I would appreciate it if they would return the compliment by leaving a comment below about my haiku. Thanks in advance, guys.)

POST-COMMENT: Jeff practically mocked me when I wrote my haiku. He said I was "cute." Cute! Ha!

POST-POST-COMMENT: They say opposites attract but commonalities keep you together.

POST-POST-COMMENT-TRANSLATION: Jeff's a geek. And now it's official, I'm a geek too. (*GASP* I can't believe no one ever told me. Emoticon.) We tell people Star Trek and ping-pong brought us together. (Another emoticon. You choose.) Maybe it's true. Afterall, I'm blogging about cylons and Jeff's designing iPhone apps behind me and we're instant messaging even though we're two feet from each other. Want to know what I just sent him? Here: Officially Our Best Ever Case.

You can't help but like it, geek or not.

Addendum:
Here's the webpage -- All The Haikus, Man
And here's the newsletter -- Discover My Famous-osity


2 comments:

Lore said...

Oh, what fun!

I came to the computer for entertainment during my pre-surgery induced 5:00AM wakefulness, not expecting an entry on your blog just yet, but hoping to find something to keep my mind off of the discomfort of my preparations, and what should I find? A highly entertaining new blog post!

Thank you so much! It made what would be a rather unpleasant experience not quite enjoyable, but certainly more tolerable.

And, congratulations on the contest win - I remember the pride you had with winning that ugly-tie contest and I shared those pleased feelings with you. Thanks for letting us in on this one too.

Love you,
Mom

Smith Family said...

Good to know that the Magic Eraser works with Sharpie! Not that I'm hoping for a Sharpie incident, but it's but good to know. I'm sure your piano is happy too.